Holiday Cheer and the Football Picks

Last week was a bit of a slow down going 2-3, but I’m still 12-4 for the past 3 weeks. Hopefully you’ve been on board recently, using these choices to beat your bookie. Remember, the goal is to make your man lose so much lettuce that he has to quit bookmaking and go legit, staying out of the underworld. Say like becoming a rent-a-center manager charging 20% interest to poor women, instead of getting 5% vigorish from middle class men.

On the subject of picks, my pre-season selections of the Bengals, Buccaneers, and Cowboys are looking really solid right now. Tell me if you can find someone else who had three bigger upset teams to make the playoffs that probably will, because I haven’t found them. Of course, I did have the Lions winning the NFC North, so ouch to that.
With the holidays coming up, here is a jingle I wrote for Christmas carolers.

(Sung to Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer)

You know Plaxico and Santana, and Chad Johnson
Randy and Laverneous, and Keyshawn Johnson,
But do you recall
The most famous jackass of all

T.O. the self-absorbed receiver
Had a very large mouth
And when he opens his pie-hole
His team goes quickly south

All of his teammates hated him
They used to shout with glee
T.O. the self-absorbed receiver
Your time with the Eagles is history.

Picks for the Week

4 star Arizona (-1) over Houston
3 star San Diego (-7.5) over Indy
3 star Dallas (+3) over Washington
2 star Seattle (-7) over Houston

Unlike most lousy teams at this point of the season, the Cardinals are still trying because their fat coach has a fat contract and is no lame duck. The Texans, on the other hand, have a coach, Done Capers, who’s less welcome in Houston than the New Orleans refugees. Arizona by 10.

Sure the Chargers choked last week worse than Ellen DeGeneres at a hot dog eating contest, but it just gives me a couple more points to play with. I’ve had this game circled for a while as the game that Indy would struggle most in. Brees, Gates, and LT make up the 3rd best offense in the NFL, behind Indy and Cincy. They have to win to stay in the playoff chase, while I believe the Colts have already clinched the AFC South in 2006. Take the Bolts to cover vs. the Colts and consider taking the money line.

Skins top 3 DB’s are out, right at the same time the Cowboys have started to throw the ball. I don’t trust Bledsoe, probably because he went to Washington State, home also of the late Ryan Leaf. What puts me on Dallas is Parcells has owned Gibbs and his team is healthier and more talented.

To think 20 years ago Jeff Fisher was savoring the life being a member of the 1985 Chicago Bears, the greatest team I’ve ever seen. Not even the Music Row hacks in Nashville could write a catchy Super Bowl shuffle rap for the Titans. “I’m Steve McNair—I’m the clunky QB.” Seattle has Indy on deck, but concentrates enough to cover the points. .

3 thoughts on “Holiday Cheer and the Football Picks

  1. 1.  Tough week Scott. I think Seattle would of covered over Houston though!

    When is your next show in Indy?

  2. 3.  Wow was that Cowboys pick awful. I go 4 star on the Cardinals and the Texans play their best game of the year. Ouch. Didn’t help that Kurt Warner was hurt early in the game.

    The only thing I feel good about was picking the Chargers, as very few were on them and they were the biggest story of the day. It looked nice that we at Frank Picks chose the Chargers and then were dogged out by the experts in the studio.

    MR Johnny-
    As you can tell from my parody song, I’m not what you would call a man of meters. More influenced by Mad Magazine.
    To me the Scorebard is like a New Yorker magazine comic. I like the offerings, but sometimes I have to fake like I understand them.

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